Naked CIO: Don't be petty

Learning to work with colleagues you don't like is good for you and your company, says the Naked CIO.

Ever think about those tense relationships at work? Or those personalities you just can't seem to get on with?

You know who I'm talking about - that CEO who treats people like replaceable parts, that CFO who thinks she knows something about IT but should just stick to finance.

Or perhaps you have people working alongside you that seem socially challenged and constantly become the source of conflict. Maybe you are at odds with that marketing professional who believes everything he touches turns to gold but you as an IT leader end up getting the blame if it doesn't.

Every work environment is the same. I am sure there are those within your company or industry that you have particularly sharp opinions about. Instead of trying to resolve these differences, the trend is to harbour them and wait for the opportunity to sabotage the individual in a way that makes you feel victorious.

All of these situations and more stir up emotional responses - most of the time it drives people into direct conflict where the greater good of the company becomes secondary to the internal battle for supremacy among two individuals.

I have seen office disputes played out too many times - with myself as a principle actor or just a bystander. I now wonder if my decisions were based on my personal differences with others or truly, as I made myself believe at the time, in the best interests of the company.

What worries me even more is that as I look back on these incidents I don't recall ever trying to do anything about it. I don't recall trying to reconcile and work together with people. Rather I sat back and waited for the opportunity to pounce on them and proclaim victory.

I know I am not alone in feeling these things. It makes me wonder though how many wasted opportunities there are in companies - and if people could just learn to work together more harmoniously, how much of a more pleasant and productive place the office could be.

Maybe I should have been more agreeable or at least talked about my differences and tried to reach a working and productive compromise with those I had challenges with.

As I think back I wonder why sometimes these opinions drive wedges into working environments and what more I could have done to alter these opinions.

In the future what can I do about what others think of me? And how can I be sure I have the best possible opinions of others?

Perhaps trying to build bridges as opposed to setting traps could be more productive for you, your company and those you work with - even if you don't like them.